I’m feeling a bit like George Bailey these days, wondering what the world would be like if I’d never been born. Last night, I lied awake thinking about what would be different.
There is the obvious, of course, that my three children would not have been born, but aside from that I can’t think of anything. I’ve not saved anyone’s life, or cured any diseases. I haven’t been the deciding vote in any contest of importance. My only creations include some not terribly meaningful blog posts and some unfinished manuscripts. Lots of poetry that no one reads but me.
Perhaps someday, one of my kids will do something phenomenal, and in their biography I will be listed as the mother. But that is them, not me, and it would be retrospection.
So what does this mean? Am I not real? Am I only alive in my own consciousness? If I were to suddenly disappear, would their be a void in the world, or simply open space?
Hmmm…..
Tags: George Bailey, life, me, Nancy Spivey, philosophy, thinking
January 21, 2009 at 2:47 pm |
Sweetie, everyone matters, regardless of what we perceive as value.
January 21, 2009 at 9:46 pm |
You have no idea whose life you may have touched while you’ve been in this world. Because of you someone may have made a change that saved their or someone else’s life. Your smile one morning may have been what made someone do something nice, or kept someone from doing something awful. A kind word from you may have saved a wife or a child from a beating. Words you’ve written may have inspired someone to write their own.
I promise there would be a you shaped void in the world, and I for one would miss you, even if we don’t hear from you often.
January 22, 2009 at 2:18 am |
Who the hell says we have to cure some disease? I’m just trying to make it through the day without killing anyone (usually my kids).
I am not obligated to save the world. Besides– we’ll end up blowing up planet Earth in the end, and no one will be around to remember anyone, famous or no. Everyone’s life will then have the exact same value.
I know! I’m as cheerful as you are!
January 22, 2009 at 2:36 am |
Jackie you may very well be saving the world by not killing your kids. After all when George Washington chopped down that tree, his parents let him live, even though they didn’t know he was THE George Washington.
January 22, 2009 at 8:38 am |
Interesting mix of perspectives here. And both sides are correct, if there is such a concept. As Shawn says, if someone did not receive a beating because of my kindness, that is certainly worthwhile, yet there are umpty-kazillion of us, and I am merely a particle of dust in the universe.
All of this is a bit deeper than my original post, but that is why I love this forum. Conversation, debate, varying points of view…
January 23, 2009 at 12:10 am |
We’re all merely a “vapor in the wind”, yet our lives touch those of so many other’s that our “echo” can be felt forever.
March 5, 2009 at 2:47 am |
Just remember mom, we are all here for a reason. Really, we are! Whether we know it or not is no matter. You have been the best mother anyone could have and an inspiration to more than you probably realize. I know you’re number one on my hero list, and I’m not just saying that!! You are!!
I think you might want to look to something new for inspiration and some answers. I want you to read a book!! “The God Question” by JP Moorland. Read it read it read it!!
March 5, 2009 at 8:22 am |
Aw, Jon, you are just so sweet. Thanks you, more than you know.
March 5, 2009 at 3:48 pm |
You are very special Mom and if you accomplish nothing else here on earth you will have lived a full life and touched the hearts of countless people.
Read the book, it might give you a new perspective. I just saw the author speak and I thought of you. You would have enjoyed him very much.
August 17, 2009 at 9:26 pm |
I’m late to this, for a number of reasons, but here are my thoughts. I have often pondered my own reason(s) for being, and mortality, often coming up short with a good reason. However, that being said, the good lord has seen fit to leave me here, even when I once tried to remove myself, and outside factors have made several attemps to my well-being. But I am here, and more importantly, here at this moment and at this spot. I have been reading your words, and they have inspired me, and rekindled questions I have held dear for a long time. I believe in the butterfly effect, wherein ones actions have a ripple effect on others in a neverending outward spiral. While you struggle with self worth, or importance of being, you need to realize the effects you have had on those around you, myself included. Thanks to the electronic medium your words, kindness, and humor have been spread about. One day, when you are least likely to find it- it will come to you. At one point, I never expected to see my 30’s, and really didn’t care. But now, I see it clearly, and know that there is meaning to it all.
August 18, 2009 at 8:37 am |
Aw, thanks. That is so sweet. I used to think that way, and I guess I’ve kind of just lost my way a bit. But your words have touched me, and I am grateful.
(And I am glad to know you, too; you cheer me immeasurably!)
September 15, 2009 at 2:31 pm |
Nancy…..you must read the book ‘The Five People You Meet In Heaven’ ~ You will then have an idea of why you’re here, and how you’ve touched the lives of others without even realizing/knowing it!